So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Randomize