i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
