Fine. I'll sleep in my office
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
