So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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