Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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