you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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