Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
