Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
operation have a gay friend backfired
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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