yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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