you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
