D3 body, D1 cock
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize