I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
