So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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