We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
soo... how was my night?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
