Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
You need a sexual gate keeper
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
