yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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