Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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