babies were throwing up all over the place
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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