first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
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