If that was your dad, he is hot
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
