its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
3pm strippers are depressing
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
