Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
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either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
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If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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