its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Randomize
