I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
