the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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