PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize