she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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