I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
