I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize