Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
