I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
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