I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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