love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize