I hate all girls vehemently.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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