i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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