Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize