I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
