Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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