He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
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i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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