i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize