He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
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two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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