Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I need a beard to bite.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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