Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
