This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
