Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
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