Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
