We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I wear drunk well.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
