it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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