Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed

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  (630): all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed http://tfl.nu/xhsk
  Replies (28) Good night (21535) Bad night (1411)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic

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  (708): Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic http://tfl.nu/vj27
  Replies (10) Good night (4761) Bad night (1187)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.

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  (903): I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink. http://tfl.nu/zmqp
  Replies (13) Good night (4800) Bad night (935)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics

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  (917): Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics http://tfl.nu/t7mh
  Replies (7) Good night (3230) Bad night (1766)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers

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  (724): Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers http://tfl.nu/1uct
  Replies (27) Good night (7813) Bad night (1072)
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  (415): View more from California

  just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.

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  (415): just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid. http://tfl.nu/grub
  Replies (9) Good night (2785) Bad night (678)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.

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  (815): Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time. http://tfl.nu/q2s4
  Replies (27) Good night (4123) Bad night (877)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just commented on the education level of his penis.

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  (734): I just commented on the education level of his penis. http://tfl.nu/tupj
  Replies (2) Good night (876) Bad night (769)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka

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  (817): Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka http://tfl.nu/xkay
  Replies (9) Good night (665) Bad night (1329)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Awkward

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.

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  (614): Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH. (440): Awkward (614): Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again. http://tfl.nu/iqp6
  Replies (2) Good night (999) Bad night (447)
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  (916): View more from California

  My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"

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  (916): My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower" http://tfl.nu/qx3d
  Replies (7) Good night (1063) Bad night (445)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.

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  (763): Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge. http://tfl.nu/dfv5
  Replies (1) Good night (799) Bad night (365)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I probably wouldn't

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  (443): Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood (410): I probably wouldn't http://tfl.nu/wahv
  Replies (1) Good night (635) Bad night (324)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.

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  (928): I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment. http://tfl.nu/bhdk
  Replies (3) Good night (317) Bad night (649)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.

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  (937): I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face. http://tfl.nu/lqby
  Replies (4) Good night (565) Bad night (245)

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