Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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